Last night we attended a fund raiser for the Guy running against Senator Buttars, arguably the most anti-gay, anti-equal rights legislator up on our capital hill. Okay, it's true, we might have donated to his opponent even if his opponent was a narcoleptic lemur, with fleas. But this guy, John Rendell, is far better than not-Buttars. I wish him the luck he needs being a Democrat in West Jordan, Utah.The fund raiser was put on by Salt Lake Acting Company, at their performance of this year's Saturday's Voyeur. It's basically a yearly parody of Utah's current events and foibles, and we often make the job of parody easy. They had Marie Osmond Dancing with the Stars, IM1RU Ring Tones, Mr. Becker's Neighborhood, Tap Dancing Queer Missionaries, and Buttars Refusing to go to racial sensitivity rehab, Amy Winehouse style.
They even did the bit they're best known for for this, their 30th anniversary: No Erection in the Resurrection, where they basically read straight from a 1970's LDS pamphlet about masturbation; not much commentary or ad libbing was needed on that. Suffice it to say, the "little factory" should not be rushed; it will send out it's excess product at night when it needs to. If you can't resist altering the, umm, production schedule of the "little factory" you can do stuff like keep a factory calendar and black out all the early, uh, shipments (?), or "think of having to bathe in a tub of worms, and eat several of them as you do the act", or even tie your hand to the bed. Good advice, that.
It's telling of both the time and subject that the funniest bit SLAC did wasn't something they wrote. If someone in my ward gave me the bruised banana example about women, I bet I'd be twice as gay as I am today; no wonder there's so many mohos ;-).
Anyway, it was a fun evening and you have about 3 weeks to see it, if you're so inclined.
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3 comments:
LOL. My "little factory" is doing fine, thank you. Even if sometimes it does need a helping hand.
TOO funny!! And frightning at the same time. You think that might be why so many people have hangups about sex?
"Even if sometimes it does need a helping hand."
No Paul! The workers, they'll go on strike.
"You think that might be why so many people have hangups about sex?"
I think (but don't know) it's getting better in our local culture (does the LDS church even still teach this or that masturbation is a serious sin?). But yeah, I think you've a point. Not only hangups but fetishes and obsessions I think come with such too. I mean, I'm sure I think about gay sex far less often than the good Senator Buttars :-) who handed out a booklet describing what he imagines it to be to the entire legislature.
Too bad it's so useful for the survival of organizations to take control of what's impotent to humans, be it food, family, community, or sex.
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